Sunday 5 April 2015

The Myths

I was lucky or unlucky (changed from time to time) to be looked after by two moms during my post delivery confinement.

My mom with the slightly modern outlook and logical way of thinking and my mom in law with her orthodox views and native intelligence. Deadly combination. Will try to give you an idea of what it meant.

Anju feed the baby after the bath and then let him nap. You can't feed before, the bath will hinder digestion.
Anju feed the baby before the bath, he will be too tired later.
I fed him when he cried...before or after.

We don't give green chillies in confinement diet....In our side red chillies are a no no. 
She can have idli but not dosa...Why the batter is the same.
We only give dried copra. Here it is fresh coconut...all in limited quantities.
And lots of ghee...one point where all agree.
Trust me the end result of this was an upset stomach.

The baby is wriggling too much....you should not drink so much water. If he spits up take a small drop of it and flick it in the air. Don't feed the baby immediately after your meal. Don't look at him while feeding...how! he is so cute. Don't drink water while feeding...yes even if you are dying of thirst.

Act like a patient. Stuff garlic and cotton in your ears, put on a scarf and sweater. Didn't happen.
Don't touch cold water or a bucket for that matter. Dry your hair completely...with my hair...all the best.
Heat up coals and take steam. All this while being fed food designed to increase body heat. I would have roasted like a chicken.
Did some of the stuff in the most diluted form and managed to scrape through.

Any excessive crying was blamed on the evil eye cast by someone. Daily some fruit, salt, rice etc was used to cast off the effects. I have to admit myth or not, my son cried inexplicably every time after a particular person visited.

The lucky part...the moms could consult each other when faced with a dilemma. They could manage the baby, the kitchen and the endless stream of guests. They split the endless washing of dirty diapers between them. I got a lot of care literally showered on me. None of us lost sleep as we 3 took turns during the night.  We all survived.

In midst of all this we laughed, shared jokes, anecdotes and discussed rituals practiced in the respective villages. We rejoiced when Arjun pooped on the other.

There maybe many women who would go through this post and say I am supposed to go through all these strict routines, pathyam and humor all the other beliefs. To each his own. I believe rest, easily digestible food, plenty of water and cleanliness are the necessities in this period. I think in midst of all the supposed care, we are not allowing women to enjoy uninhibited time with their baby. Some of the rules make sense, others need to be reviewed. Moderation moms!!

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